Today’s post isn’t showcasing new music or teaching you about anything… more just me thinking out loud about creating.
I think we’ve all figured out by now that I don’t know how to sit still. I can’t just work on one thing because I get anxious and burn out. If I’m working on a bunch of things at once, it feels like I’m balancing my time well (even though I’m probably working more) because I spend a little while on this, a little while on that.
However, my health’s been giving me the ol’ wake-up call lately and it’s prevented me from posting YouTube videos. I literally can’t stay awake long enough to finish filming without looking like I’m about to drop dead half way through. I’ve been writing more here and elsewhere — which I’m loving — and taking this time to think about how I want to move forward.
YouTube has become so unstable for creators. Instagram is rolling out TOO many features that don’t include a damn chronological timeline. The blogging world feels like it’s being taken over by blogs that teach you how to start a blog that teaches other people how to blog. None of these platforms feel truly creative anymore, and it makes me feel unfulfilled when I post to them.
But I LOVE CREATING, and therein lies the problem. I’ll never stop posting!! I am a cog in the content machine!! But I want to feel good about it when I do. I want to flex my creative muscles and do more than I’m currently capable of, as determined by the constraints of time and money and ability. I just don’t know how.
Digital content creation is still such a new landscape. It’s so hard to ask for help when no one else has any answers either. We’re all struggling together! How sad (alexa play i’m not okay (i promise))
And so, that brings us to this post. I’ve been spending my time doing a lil think-think. I’ve also been running obnoxious Twitter polls because I always want to be creating things that help y’all (thank you if you’ve voted and eased my anxiety LOL). But at the same time, I want to focus on the things I like creating the most as well. So here are my current thoughts.
- I love creating videos about music
- I don’t love sitting in my room talking to the camera as much anymore
- I wish I could have someone help me film so I can do more on-the-go type music content
- I love making Spotify playlists and sharing new music
- I want to interview more artists but I’m SUPER BORED with the standard interview model
- I kind of want to do more social/relaxed interviews? A lil more YouTube-y??
- But I also kind of want to start a podcast, which could be a great way to do band interviews
- I want to work full-time on my creative work to give myself the chance I feel I deserve
- I also just applied for like 6 full-time music industry jobs in London, UK so LOOOOL
- I want to have an Instagram aesthetic because I look at Amy Valentine‘s feed and get heartburn because I’m mad my feed is so ugly
- But I also want to NOT CARE and just post photos I like, life is so HARD
- I’m actually really serious about this podcast idea and I already have a name for it honestly